my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Randomize
