Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Randomize
