I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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