Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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