the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
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