I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
