My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
