the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
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