It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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