No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
