and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
