yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Randomize