I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Randomize
