I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
How does one acquire holy water?
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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