how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I need a beard to bite.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Randomize
