I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize