chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
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