I would like to be the first to explain to you that if you've woken up with bruised knuckles this morning, it's because last night you tried climbing out of our car window and into the drive through window at maccas. The cashier chick freaked out and slammed the window on you and beat you around the head with her headset thingy.
Shittttttt.
Be not ashamed. It was youtube-worthy.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
my liver is dry heaving
Randomize
