Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
