its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
