I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
He keeps bees of course he's weird
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Panties = found
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
