I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
