Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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