I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Randomize
