Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
