I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
You are the jesus of drinking
Randomize
