honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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