worst night to have a conscience
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Randomize
