real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
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