"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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