yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
