The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
