This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
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