Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Non-Jews are for practice
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Randomize
