Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
