Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Randomize
