I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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