my vag is so smooth its legendary
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize