I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
