dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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