Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
It was confusing and full of hummus
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
