windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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