its not stalking. its research.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Omg I joined a choir last night...
Randomize
