he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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