his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Randomize
