I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
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