idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
