I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
