i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Randomize
