Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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