I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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